Entries Tagged 'Wisdom' ↓

Also on my long evening walk today, I had a flash of searing clarity. I realized that it took guts to be happy, contented, satisfied. And to accept it to oneself.

Probably because it is so uncommon, a person who is happy with him/herself is an oddity.

And so, the rest of his or her circle of friends, acquaintances and associates try to make that obvious - and try to drag them back down into the pit of smoldering dissatisfaction that seems to be the norm for many.

It’s hard enough to be happy and content. First, it demands knowledge of what you really want. Then, it requires understanding that you have it - and deserve it.

Because this is so tenuous and unsure, it becomes easy for anyone to question, criticize and ultimately unravel the thin cocoon of happiness you weave around yourself… unless you are bold, confident and even - to a point - arrogant.

Earlier today, I had a conversation with a friend. He was pointing out ways I could do better with my efforts to fund heart surgeries for children. Each involved doing something that would involve a lot of time and effort, for little return.

I smilingly turned down his suggestions, managing not to offend him… while he subtly seemed to indicate I was leaving many children uncared for by doing so.

Thinking back to 10 years ago, when similar behavior might have made me defensive, and therefore abusive and angry, I feel a small thrill of satisfaction at my emotional development over the years.

After all, isn’t that what growing up is all about?

If you haven’t yet read it, my 2 page free report may interest you. It’s called “The Happiness Paradigm” - read it here.

New here? Please pick up your three FREE gifts - click here. Hope you like them. And drop by often!

On my evening walk today, I bumped into my classmate from medical school. She’s a pediatric oncologist. A medical specialist caring for children battling with that deadliest of diseases - cancer!

She is an intelligent, compassionate and emotionally strong doctor. That’s the only way she could sustain a busy professional schedule in such a stressful specialty for nearly 7 years.

But eventually, the strain became too much.

A few weeks back, she decided to move out. The decision came when her young daughter asked one evening:

“Mummy, have you forgotten how to smile?”

That’s when she realized that the severe emotional burden of caring for terminally ill children had changed her usual vivacious and cheerful nature into one of a shell-shocked veteran.

Yes, doctors die a little bit… every day.

As a heart surgeon treating little children born with heart defects, I find the emotional challenges the hardest part of my work.

It is the most devastating experience to see a young patient succumb to a serious illness. It leaves a caretaker feeling helpless, frustrated, impotent… and angry.

How much potential is lost! Every child that falls prey to these horrible illnesses could have been an Einstein, a Mother Theresa, a Mozart or a Gandhi. The snuffing out of this bright candle plunges everyone in that universe into the coldest darkness.

When a child with congenital heart disease dies, a part of me dies too.

And that’s the most powerful motivator for what I do to help fund expensive, yet life-saving heart surgery through my Children Heart Foundation.

Today, after talking it over with my friend, I had a tiny, faint glimpse into the reason why doctors are larger than life, live in an illusory world of exalted self-esteem.

It’s because they see life from a unique, unusual and different perspective.

And make unreal, unnatural, abnormal adaptations to make sense of the distorted reality that is part of our everyday professional existence.

Allow us our posturing and pretence. We pay a heavy price in exchange - every day.

This tale from Egyptian yore may make you think again!

Theodore Davis (1837-1915) was a rich American whose first excavations in the Valley of the Kings (a valley in western Thebes, where nearly all the Egyptian pharaohs from 1524-1070 B.C. were buried) began in 1903.

Davis’s team found many tombs, mostly robbed of their precious contents. However, there were still wall paintings, mummies and less valuable artifacts to study.

In 1912, Davis gave up excavating, sure that there was nothing left to find.

Within about 6 feet of where he stopped work was the entrance to the one tomb in the Valley that had NOT been robbed…

The Tomb of Tutankhamun

Around Christmas time last year, I first heard about an amazing young lady. She was making a difference. And doing it in style.

I was blown away by her ‘25 Days to Make a Difference‘ experiment. Blogged about it. Emailed friends. Told others on forums.

Many other people must have noticed too, because within 24 hours, her blog had received over TEN THOUSAND visitors!

The name of this little rockstar is

Little Laura has since become my friend - and my inspiration.

If you know many school-girls, you’ll also know how fickle and short their attention spans are. My daughter is nine. It’s hard to get her to concentrate on anything for longer than a few hours, or at most, a few days.

Laura hasn’t let the spark set off in December fade away. She has sustained it to become a steady flame that has warmed thousands of hearts - and built a following of equally dedicated youngsters to participate in their own ventures to make a difference, to make the world a nicer place.

On the long walk I took yesterday when I came up with the idea of “My IMPACT Factor” challenge, Laura’s project was what I was thinking about.

As children, we all have dreams. Unreal, perhaps, but certainly ambitious. In the innocence of youth, we are fired by the highest ideals, the worthiest ambitions, the noblest motives.

Sadly, however, we grow up. And somewhere along that path to adulthood, we either lose them or make them secondary to other ‘practical realities’.

“My IMPACT Factor” challenge is your chance to revert to childhood for a little while - in a nice way. To go back to the days when we really believed with all our hearts that we can make a difference.

Join the challenge. Make a difference. Change the world.

I learn a lot from my young daughter.

She asks questions that make me think - about things I’ve assumed clarity and certainty.  She offers insights that are startling, even shocking.  And yesterday, while explaining the difference between ‘empathy’ and ’sympathy’, I had a mini-Aha moment!

Here’s how I explained it.

Sympathy is when you see someone going through a hard time, or suffering pain, or experiencing loss - and say or think to yourself, “Oh, how sad!”

Empathy is when you see that happen, and FEEL that way - because you identify yourself with what they are experiencing.

So empathy is a deeper, more meaningful, and harder to feel emotion than sympathy.

And as I explained this to a 9 year young lady, it struck me that in many years, I hadn’t thought much about this difference!

Sympathy is more superficial, empathy is deep and comes from one’s heart.

And there are some things you simply cannot empathize with except by letting down barriers, feeling deep, searing pain, and taking a leap of imagination to imagine how it might be to be in someone else’s shoes.

I’m a fan of ‘effectiveness systems’ - things that make me more effective.

And to clarify, I make a distinction between being efficient (which is doing things quickly and well) and being effective (which is doing the things that really matter).

My bookshelf is loaded with books on time management, goal setting, and personal organization. By putting a lot of what I’ve learned into action, my day stretches to a functional equivalent of 27 hours.

Which is why I bought the domain name, www.Your27HourDay.com, thinking to write a book on the subject.

Anyway, over the years, having explored many options, I’ve distilled the lessons learned into a system that works - and last week, modified and updated my system for working online.

While posting about it on Twitter, Ross Goldberg asked to see a longer blog post about it - so here it is!

The ’system’ involves having a ‘dashboard’ - which is just a fancy word for a web page full of links that I have set as my browser’s default homepage. Every time I fire up my Firefox web browser, this page loads.

I have figured out that simply avoiding having to type in URLs of pages I visit frequently saves between 5 and 30 minutes daily! With my dashboard, I just ‘point and click’.

My main dashboard has these sections -

Forums: These are the handful of forums I visit often and post regularly on.

Google: My Adsense and Adwords account pages to review stats quickly.

Blogs: Links to all my major blogs that need frequent updates.

Memberships: Sites I run or belong to, and need constant access to.

Ecommerce: Quick links to Clickbank, PayPal and PayDotCom homepages.

Automation Stations: Shortcuts to my web hosts’ cPanel pages.

The last one is most interesting - ROUTINES.

This is something I learned from ZEN TO DONE - creating routines helps improve efficiency, and keeping only the right things on your routine ensures better effectiveness.

I have 2 sets of routines - one for the morning, the other for the evening. And both are linked from my ‘dashboard’.

I wake up in the morning, fire up a web browser window, click on MORNING ROUTINES, and have a quick reminder of what’s to be done - with links to those websites to make it fast and easy!

What gets on each routine?

That’s entirely up to you, and depends on your personal goals, targets, purpose and available time.

My ‘daily activity’ list in the MORNING ROUTINE looks like this:

1. Process inboxes, reply to messages.
2. List 3 top things to do (Zen to Done)
3. Work on the 3 things.

Simple, yes?

But you won’t believe how powerfully effective it can be - until you try it.

The ‘3 important things’ lesson is again something I picked up from ZEN TO DONE - and it is awesome.

My productivity grew exponentially by following this, because where I once was all over the place, trying to cram as many things on my ‘to do’ list for the day and getting anxious and frustrated, I now calmly execute the 3 major tasks - and DO THEM FIRST!

That leaves the rest of the day free for other things, some fun, some work and even for just ‘wasting some time’ - while still having a deep sense of satisfaction and fulfillment that the important work has been done!

So, What’s NEW?

This system of ‘dashboards’ and ‘routines’ have been a part of my daily life for a few months. What’s changed is the focus I’ve set for each day of my week.

Here’s how my ‘Day of the Week’ task list looks now:

Monday: Compile a final list of links worth checking out for my list.

Tuesday: Negotiating JV deals and work related to my CHD Foundation.

Wednesday: Update blog with new episode of “My Story” or write a new article.

Thursday: Financial and investments related work.

Friday: Promote a product or service to my list, with full review.

Saturday: Reading.

Sunday: Email management and networking.

How does this help?

Where I once would waste time each morning trying to think about what I felt like doing that day, I now just have to look at the list - and start planning my ‘top 3 things’ list.

And by making sure all the important elements of my work find a place on that ‘Day of the Week’ task list, I can be certain that all the work being done is effective, not merely ‘efficient’.

I know revealing what happens ‘behind the screen’ is a poor strategy for magicians. And judging by feedback and astonished questions I get asked by readers, subscribers and clients, I know many think of me as some kind of magician, considering how many things I get done in a typical day.

On two previous occasions, I have blogged in detail about a ‘Day in the Life of Dr.Mani’ - here (2005) and here (2007).

This effectiveness-based approach is what is responsible, in main, for such results. That, and a time management system taught by one of my mentors - and whom I finally convinced to teach and share with others through a book!

The first draft of this book is now done, and we’re looking to make it much better and extensive before launching it to the public. In the meantime, we’re soliciting suggestions and opinions from anyone interested in time management - yes, that includes YOU.

Would you mind sparing a few moments to take a short survey about what you most want to learn about time management, please? Thank you

Time Management Survey - click here

Image credit http://www.sxc.hu

If you’re like me, you’re DROWNING in a sea of information.

More email. More special reports. More web pages to read.

And that’s not all.

There’s even more!

More video to watch. More audio to listen to. More people to follow.

At times, it can become OVERWHELMING.

But only if YOU let that happen!

I’ve not completely mastered the art of overcoming information overload, but I do have a system. It works for me. It will work for you.

I’m going to outline my ’system’ - and if you have any input that will add, expand or improve upon it, please share it with me… you’ll be doing me a big favor!

#1 - Prioritize

I’m a heart surgeon. In active practice. Need to keep learning and staying up to date in my specialty.

I’m also a widely followed online marketer and infopreneur. Many people rely on me for timely advice and direction.

So stuff related to these roles is important to me. Other things are less so.

I do enjoy and relax by doing some other things - but those come SECOND to the important ones.

By setting priorities and keeping them straight, I make sure my most productive time is focused on what really matters.

#2 - Discipline

I have set myself a routine. One for the morning, before I go to work. Another for the evening, after I finish my day’s work.

My morning routine includes a short workout, checking email and answering important messages, and visiting one or two forums or blogs to read and post.

Then, my day’s work begins.

Following the lesson I learned in ZEN TO DONE, I make THREE daily priority tasks - and those simply must GET DONE!

Everything else that crosses my desk or email inbox or is brought to my notice gets filed for ‘future reference’. I get to them ONLY after the 3 daily priority tasks are finished.

#3 - Efficiency

Too many people put this first. I put it 3rd, because it is possible to be efficient, but INEFFECTIVE… if your priorities are not right.

For example, my good friend Willie Crawford tells me we’ll be seeing a ton of fresh product launches in the IM niche this month. Already, Jeff Walker hinted at it in his notes to PLF 2.0 owners.

What does this mean to me?

I can PREPARE to stay abreast of them - without diverting myself from my planned course of action.

* I won’t read the marketing messages - but will file them for later.

* I won’t ignore the launches - but won’t waste time analyzing each one.

* I won’t criticize the marketers - but will learn from them, on MY terms, and on MY schedule.

Knowledge is power. And forewarned is forearmed. I’m not running and hiding because the deluge is about to hit. I’m just planning and allotting resources appropriately.

THE HARDEST THING TO DO…

All of these things are easy - when compared to this last ’success secret’.

FOCUS

One key for my being able to get so many things done is that I have laser-keen focus on what I’m doing at any time.

For instance, while I’m writing this message to you, my 2 little nieces want me to play with them, so does my young daughter, and there’s an Indian Premier League cricket match going on which I’d love to watch.

But I’m writing this note.

It will take me 10 to 15 minutes to finish. After that, I’ll go play - and watch the match.

Earlier, I might have stopped in between to follow one of many distractions.

It not only slows down the work, it destroys the ‘flow’. What could be done in 10 minutes may drag on for half a day - and that’s such a waste!

The same focus extends into my bigger projects. I try to take a new project idea from concept to completion before dabbling in the next one.

And while my personal style is to handle 3 to 5 different projects at the same time, each of them does get done on a timetable - and project #6, 7 or 8 will not begin until then!

You can follow a similar approach too.

Here’s an example.

You are at a unique stage in your business growth. And what you need may or may not be what’s hot at the moment.

If you don’t have a product ready to launch, then Jeff Walker’s ‘Product Launch Formula 2.0′ is not essential for you.

Did you completely ignore my emails to you about it?

If you did, GOOD FOR YOU

Or take this situation.

If you are not yet sure what is the best way to explore building a business online, and you think being an infopreneur is a good idea, you may want to learn more about it… and so

* you’ll go to my Infopreneur blog

* you’ll read the story of how I got started as an infopreneur

* you’ll download the 4 free infopreneur reports

* you’ll consider buying ‘Think, Write & RETIRE‘ or ‘The Internet Infopreneur SYSTEM‘

BUT…

If you already know you want to be an expert at affiliate marketing, or have a lead generation model that works, or rely primarily on domaining for your
revenue - then you should completely ignore anything I tell you about being an infopreneur!

Are You Beginning To See The Light?

Do you believe it IS possible to beat info-overload?

Can you condition yourself to follow this approach?

This is a SIMPLE and EFFECTIVE process to handle information overload.

-> Decide clearly what you need to focus on.

-> Stick to that decision in the face of temptation.

-> Do your work and do it well/fast/cleanly.

-> Stay on target until you get the job done.

Remember - if you can see your goal and know what takes you towards it, then it is infinitely easier to ignore anything else that takes you off course.

And as a corollary, when you don’t know what you really want, it’s easy to scurry down rabbit-holes and get nowhere in a hurry!

Make your choice - beat information overload, starting right NOW!

Having influence is NOT always a bed of roses!

image credit sxc.hu

Along with influence comes a certain unavoidable degree of visibility, where you start living in a kind of fishbowl and are held up to a level of keen observation, and even criticism, that you probably weren’t used to before.

I personally dislike publicity. Have always grown up shielding myself from the spotlight, trying to make a difference behind the scenes. It worked - small time.

Until suddenly, one day in 1999, I realized that the heroes I grew up on, the folks I learned to look up to and learn from, WERE NO LONGER VISIBLE. I’m sure they existed, just weren’t as widely talked about, or promoted, or publicized.

I wondered why.

Today we have unscrupulous politicians, thieving criminals, unethical business-people, immoral stars (movie, music et al) as the ULTRA VISIBLE role models our youth must look up to - because there’s no alternative.

That was the day I wrote a stinging letter to India’s largest weekly magazine, INDIA TODAY. With a circulation of over FIVE MILLION in different Indian languages.

To my shock, they mentioned it in the EDITORIAL - on the first page.

And did a DIFFERENT kind of cover story from their regular style - on people, Indians, folks our youth and country must look up to. Sports superstars and social workers, novelists and entrepreneurs, people worth emulating and dreaming of becoming.

And that was the day I decided it would be IRRESPONSIBLE to let my personal feelings about publicity and visibility get in the way.

I would overcome my natural reticence and shyness, work on living with it, to draw attention to the work I do, the causes I support, the people I admire, the needs of sick children in India and the world.

Do I enjoy it? Absolutely not.

I feel VERY strange when I receive adulatory emails from folks across the globe. When total strangers write to say they’ve been moved to doing things after seeing what I’ve achieved.

But then I sit back and think… what if this encourages THEM to go for their dreams.

That’s when I decide it’s probably worth the trouble. The discomfort.

Yes, influence carries with it some discomfort.

I have to get out of my comfort zone to get this effect. So that others as scared as I once was know there are people DOING this, and so they can get the courage, the belief, the role model to follow on the path to fulfilling their own destiny.

I am not comfortable being praised in public. Would rather hide under a
bushel of anonymity.

But some things are more important.

Being seen as a role model for younger, more energetic but less directed or guided people, is one of those.

It doesn’t make the decision easier or the situation more pleasant - but at least, there’s a purpose to be achieved by enduring the discomfort of influence.

I use Aweber for most of my autoresponders. One of the lists has a bit over 1,800 subscribers. Today, I got an email from someone who tried to subscribe to it. Here’s what it says:

Reading it, I realized this was a wonderful opportunity to share with you some powerful and valuable lessons about working online.

This is NOT to poke fun at a potential subscriber who just might have disabilities that limit him from getting it right. My mother often forgets to dial in to her ISP - and then wonders why she cannot access her email! So… this isn’t a direct or veiled ‘attack’ on the hapless subscriber.

But at the same time, there are just so many things wrong with such an approach/attitude that if you see some parts of it in yourself, make an effort to change - because it could sabotage your level of success, influence and growth.

#1 - “Link wont WORK.”

This accusation/statement stems from placing blame OUTSIDE yourself.

Obviously the link works. 1,800 others have proved it. Maybe there was a temporary glitch, or more likely, maybe there’s something YOU were doing wrong.

Do not start off blaming others - try and figure out where YOU may have made a mistake, and fix it.

#2 - “It comes up with. Error you are already registered…”

And still he kept trying to register AGAIN. Probably because clicking on the link is a familar, easier task than to think about what else needs doing, what the next step should be.

If you’ve taken a step but haven’t reached your destination, check if you need to a) take more steps or b) take a different route/path

#3 - “…which I have done at least 8 times ,but it wont work”

One definition of insanity is doing the same thing - but expecting a different result!

If you want a different outcome, CHANGE what you are doing. Just repeating things over and over does NOT guarantee the outcome you desire.

Got any similar stories with a moral to share?

Amid the cluster of gurus proclaiming that you should “follow the money”, I’m in the minority who suggest first finding your PASSION.

There’s a reason for this. It works. And it makes ‘work’ more fun.

But the real power of being passionate comes from the magic that it weaves upon anyone who comes into contact with you.

I’ll explain this better with a real case study - from my online experience yesterday.

It took me from being a stranger, to a student, and then a client, an affiliate and an evangelist - all within ONE HOUR!

Meet Mari Smith

Yesterday afternoon, she was a stranger who had contacted me via Facebook.

Her note of introduction mentioned the name of a mutual friend whom I trust a lot. So I explored what Mari was doing.

Interestingly enough, it was related to what I was researching - How To Use Facebook.

As I clicked on links leading me to more and more material created by Mari Smith, one thing stood out clearly like a beacon.

Mari was PASSIONATE about Facebook. Using it. Teaching others how to use it.

Why Facebook?

See her blog and you’ll feel it too…

The first post I read was “I Heart my Facebook and Twitter Communities!” and it had this bit that grabbed my attention and created a bond with Mari.

“…just by being out there and being yourself, bringing joy, adding value, uplifting people’s spirits with no “agenda” - people will remember you and want to connect with you.

Even if you’re not a natural-born Connector, there are certain steps you can take to maintain terrific visibility and exposure. And, authentically commenting, congratulating, and acknowledging others is certainly one of those steps.

We must keep in mind–regards online social networks, in particular - it’s relationships first, business second. This is my mantra!”

Facebook Fortunes

It’s obvious Mari really ‘gets’ Facebook and social media marketing/networking. Her Facebook profile reveals she has close to 2,000 ‘Friends’ and is very active on it. Her Twitter profile is just as interesting.

So I chose to study her Facebook approach - and discovered the free course, Facebook Fortunes - How To Grow Your Network And Your Net Worth on Facebook!”

The content is worth paying for - but Mari’s giving it away for free.

“Facebook for Professionals”

And there’s a method to her ‘madness’ because that free content, combined with her passionate style of teaching students how to use Facebook, make it an absolutely simple decision to get her ‘advanced’ course, “Facebook for Professionals”.

So, within 30 minutes of first hearing about Mari Smith, I was sending her money to learn from her.

Is she the only Facebook ‘expert’ around? Absolutely not. But she is a PASSIONATE expert - and that makes a huge difference when it comes to learning!

PodClass

The course is delivered through a service called PodClass - and that’s worth a blog post in and of itself. Check it out - there’s a ton of features for anyone looking to teach a course online.

Anyway… I’m in the members’ area, viewing the first 3 videos - and learning a LOT about Facebook and using it effectively to further my goals, and using it strategically to avoid the typical wasteful (even if temporarily entertaining) visits down rabbit-holes, when it suddenly struck me that this information was GOLDEN for my clients who themselves use Facebook.

From Customer To Affiliate - And More!

So quickly I drafted out an email to invite them to check out “Facebook for Professionals”.

Within an hour, I had gone from being a complete stranger, to a student, then a customer, and now an affiliate for Mari Smith’s Facebook program - and even more.

I was an admiring evangelist of this passionate teacher of Facebook ’secrets’ - and telling my list of over 3,000 people about her, telling my Twitter following of over 500 people about her, sending private messages on forums to people I knew would find this material helpful, and now blogging about it here!

Why?

Was it for the money I’d get as an affiliate for spreading the word? Here’s the thing. The course is priced very modestly at $197.00 when it launches on April 7th.

But when I joined, it was at the pre-launch introductory offer of $47.

By waiting 24 hours, I could have QUADRUPLED my affiliate referral fee. But I told my list right away - because I was caught up in the passion and the talent of this Facebook coach (to be fair, Mari is more than just a ‘Facebook coach’, she’s a social media marketing coach!)

Passion + Talent = Success

That’s how raw passion and talent work. You get even curious strangers caught up in the magic. Turn them into passionate supporters of your work. Get word of mouth buzz going and growing that you CANNOT buy at any price.

I have tapped into such a tidal wave of energy in the work I am really passionate about - helping sick little children with heart birth defects, and helping struggling home business owners find success online.

Yes, the money is nice.

Mari posted on Twitter that 85 orders have come in already while she puts the finishing touches on her 100+ page manual for the “Facebook for Professionals” course.

But that, in a sense, matters little when your work is fired by PASSION.

And also, the passion that you bring to the table sets you apart from any competition.

Mari says on her blog: “I do not believe in competition. Especially for the solopreneur. There’s only one YOU. No one can “compete” to be you.”

I agree. Your passion and dedication to the niche you are involved in can itself serve as your differentiator, your unique selling point, your brand identity.

I’ve made it a cornerstone of mine.

Finally, passion fuels the fire. Keeps you going. For as long as it takes.

In a report I shared some years ago, and which has been downloaded and read by over FIVE THOUSAND people, I share the story of how it took me 8 long years before any meaningful success was achieved.

How Long Does Success Take? - Read it, click here to download

Without passion, those 8 years might have been torture.

Because of passion, they were inspiring, educational and entertaining years.

Find your passion.

Reach your success.